Tears from then

I don’t have to tell you or this world,
How I miss you larger than life,
Every once in a while.
People need not know my longings of love,
For they are those who made me fear
Days from the past, days of my future.
Why must I shed any tear for a humanly soul,
That shredded my devotion into grains of dust,
And her-my life! Why should I waste her anymore than today.
I have come a long way from that visiting,
And yet fragments of it strive along,
Needing an outburst every one fortnight.
Children around my home play along,
At ease with anonymous sentiment of triumph,
But do they feel defeat just as hard?
I remember days of my childhood,
How it all went and how I lost,
I did feel terrible and ugliest.
She was a bright sunshine I longed for,
Her aroma aroused the dead,
Sadly, hers was the way of the devil-bleek.
I remember my years of growing up,
I did see some victory then,
But initial failure struck a little too longer than forever.
Memories are bittersweet
And with them comes tears;
tears of joy, tears of sorrow,
Tears that leave an entire lifetime in wound,
Tear that roar the soul of a lifeless cold man.